I'm with you on this. It's always seemed weird to me. I mean, I do comment on people's attractiveness to other people, but it seems odd to seek out their partner -- the one person who you'd think least likely to need alerting to the person's attractiveness -- and tell them. Complimenting them on their choice seems a bit weird, almost patronising -- I mean, if their partner's right for them, they don't need somebody else to say "Oh yes, good choice, I approve". Or they shouldn't need it.
(If someone tells me sion_a is attractive I'll most likely beg them to tell him that, since he seems to have trouble believing it...)
I think (on reflection) the reason it seems odd is that it pushes all my "I am not somebody's property" rant buttons. If somebody tells my partners that they think I'm attractive, it feels rather like they're admiring my partners' property -- it's like the way you'd tell somebody how nice their house is or how cool their clothes are.
I remember a story involving aliens who thought humans (well, English speaking ones...) were very odd for using the same possessive for possessions and people - they thought "my friend" and "my book" should have different words for "my", to distinguish association relationships from ownership relationships.
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(no subject)
Date: 2003-08-04 02:48 am (UTC)(If someone tells me
(no subject)
Date: 2003-08-04 11:48 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2003-08-05 02:06 am (UTC)I think (on reflection) the reason it seems odd is that it pushes all my "I am not somebody's property" rant buttons. If somebody tells my partners that they think I'm attractive, it feels rather like they're admiring my partners' property -- it's like the way you'd tell somebody how nice their house is or how cool their clothes are.
Oh well. My neurosis. Never mind.
(no subject)
Date: 2003-08-05 01:23 pm (UTC)